Children's Handles

Have you ever wondered why children raised in a Christian home often go to college and turn away from the faith? Or why most teenagers and young single Christians are not really any better at handling relationships than their non-Christian? I suspect that both problems have a similar response.

When I was young and single young, I had many questions about relationships. I had one foot in the church and one foot in the world. Part of me really wanted to do things (and I knew a lot about what was right). The other part of me was embroiled in relation to the world the ideas offered. And I have not had the feeling - or training - to be able to distinguish one from another. They have all been thrown into a pile in my mind and nobody knew which way to exit at any time.

I guess I was not very different from most children are raised in the church today. Growing up, I spent at least eight hours per day in this world of children (as most children do these days). So I knew how they acted. But I also received a good education for my parents and my church. So I knew a lot of truth.

This created a problem, however. Although there is a seed of truth planted in me that has been nourished and growing, I have been planted among the thorns for most of my waking hours. I love people and I wanted to have good relations. But I have been in conflict. I do not really know how to develop mature relationships. Most of my relations were pretty shallow. Those that grow almost always ended badly, grew apart, or became fashionable in some way or another (except for some with strong believers).

Only I am so many of these worldly ideas that I have finally started to develop lasting and profound. And get rid of these ideas do not happen overnight. It took a lot of painful work to remove the weeds of my life. Fortunately, the grace of God was stronger than keep the world on me.

As parents, we can not keep our children out of the world. They must live in it and be a part of it. But how to protect them from having the same struggles that I had? The answer is in how we prepare them and how we expose to the world.

Most parents have a more reactive to their parents. They throw their children into the world and then hope to deal with whatever the world throws at them once they see in their children. Doing this is akin to raising your children among the thorns and weeds. And, as the parable of the sower says (Luke 8), when plants are young, they are much more susceptible to thorns. In fact, the spines can stifle them.

Instead parents need to have a much more proactive approach to training. It is far better to train your children first, then gradually expose them to the world to see how they handle small pieces of the exhibition. If'm doing well, congratulate them and to develop it. If they do not, correct them gently and retraining.

As they grow in your training, they will be able to deal with weeds and thorns much more effective. When they go to college, they can cope with the added freedom and difficult situations much better. And their relations will be deeper and more fertile early in life. These relationships deep roots act as if the world is against them. They can bring them back, when the winds blow harder. After all, a great oak hardly notices the bushes at his feet. But a young tree is easily overcome.